As a child, Jeremy Lin never felt like he belonged on the basketball court. Never mind that he later became a finalist for California’s state high school player of the year, a two-time, All-Ivy League player at Harvard, and a nine-year NBA player – including turning into an overnight sensation during the famous “Linsanity” 2011-12 season with the New York Knicks.
“I remember I would show up onto the basketball court (as a child) and it was either people would be laughing at me or looking at me like I’m crazy or that I was an alien,” Lin said at the Aspen Institute’s Project Play Summit. “Or they’d be telling me, ‘This is a basketball court, volleyball is not on until after this game.’ They could call me racist names, racist jokes. They would call me Yao Ming. They would fight and argue over who gets to guard me because they thought I would be an easy matchup and they would dominate me.
“I never felt like just a basketball player. I never walked onto the court and felt like I was one of those guys. I was always the Asian basketball player.”
It wasn’t until recently, when Lin began working with a sports psychologist, that he says he realized the emotional and racial trauma he was carrying, starting as a child. He attributed his reluctance to speak openly about his mental health for so long because of a common reason among athletes – pride and ego.
Lin’s message to kids: Every athlete faces fears. “Courage is what allows people to fight through their fear,” he said. “It’s not that you don’t feel fear at all. You’re going to feel fear and that’s OK. It’s whether that fear cripples you and doesn’t allow you to move forward.”
Lin, who now plays in China, said children are so impressionable that they don’t understand how to apply the truth behind sayings commonly used in our sports culture, such as “man up,” “suck it up,” “tough it out,” “never show weakness,” and “just fight through it.” Some of these sayings have worthy principles, Lin said, but they’re often taken too far out of context and can have detrimental effects on young athletes.
“What does ‘man up’ even mean?” Lin said. “To me, actually if I was to ‘man up’ and try to be strong, really what that means is to admit that I’m weak when I feel weak and to ask for help when I need help. Because when I try to ‘man up’ and I don’t ask for help and then I fail, I fail miserably and then I fail over and over again.”
In Lin’s case, he said he suppressed his fears for years, pretending they didn’t exist. Growing up, he idolized the uber-confident Michael Jordan. Lin figured it was natural to emulate a sports culture that often only shows athletes’ bold predictions and glitzy highlights, not their private fears and behind-the-scenes mistakes along their journey.
“My rookie year with the Golden State Warriors, I could not eat before games,” Lin said. “I could not sleep. I couldn’t eat the night before. It got so bad, I had to talk on the phone with my agent for two or three hours before each game so he could give me the courage to go onto the court and play as close to fearless as I could. I played, but I played with tremendous fear.”
The next year, Lin came out of nowhere to briefly dominate for the Knicks. He scored 20 or more points in nine games during a 10-game stretch and averaged 22.3 points and nine assists in a 13-game period. He was all over the news, ticket prices for the Knicks soared, and Internet searches for Lin’s name exploded. He was a rare Asian American player thriving in the NBA.
“It happened because I was finally able to let go of this anxiety and fear,” Lin said. “The interesting thing about it is three weeks into Linsanity, that anxiety came back. … It’s because I was anxious and wanted to be who everybody wanted me to be.”
Racist taunts followed Lin throughout his career. In retrospect, Lin wishes he had learned at a younger age how to absorb negative energy from racism in sports and turn it into positive energy. He used the incidents as motivation during his career but discovered “there’s a lot of trauma” that comes with thinking no one would ever believe in his skills or help him.
“These instances (of racism for kids in sports), they’re like forks in a road,” Lin said. “They can put you on one trajectory or another, and it’s on you to figure out how to handle this, even if it’s not right and not fair. After the game, I definitely think (kids) should talk with people and share, and even have a conversation with the person that said it to you. I wouldn’t be opposed to that. Just say, ‘Hey, where are you coming from?’ Being open and talking about it, it takes a lot of courage, but I’m a big believer of that.”
“Mental health is a huge problem in the Asian American community right now because of COVID but also because of the violence toward Asians. … They don’t even want to go to the grocery store. They’re definitely not going to go play sports.”
Jeremy Lin, pro basketball player, on Project Play data from the Reimagining School Sports initiative showing Asian American youth lost interest in sports during the pandemic more than any other race or ethnicity
Soccer stars: Parents can make sports fun by focusing less on results
Today, Alex Morgan added her name to the list of more than 250 athletes who have endorsed the Children’s Bill of Rights in Sports, a set of principles drafted by the Aspen Institute designed to create a shared cultural understanding that all children should have the opportunity to develop through sports. On Opening Night, she was joined by three of her teammates with the Orlando Pride, all of whom, like Morgan, have won World Cups with the U.S. women’s national soccer team.
The focus of their conversation was one of the rights of children – to have fun. But what does fun exactly mean? How does that notion change as children age? And are there considerations that coaches need to keep in mind when coaching girls, in particular?
Morgan, who is among the top five all-time leading goal scorers among U.S. women, said girls need team environments as major boosters for their confidence and self-esteem. “I think girls have a lot more pressures than boys in terms of image, who your friends are, do you have to excel in all things,” she said. “Those pressures aren’t on boys at young ages. Is it right? No, but that’s the world we live in today.”
Parents should ask the right questions of their children in sports, not simply whether they won or lost, said Harris, a two-time World Cup champion goalie. “What did you learn from this? How do you feel in this moment? What did you enjoy most about today?” Harris said, listing questions parents can ask their child after practices and games. “If we can change the conversation and not be so result-driven, we wouldn’t feel those pressures, especially as women. … Changing our tone and conversation with our children is so important, and that’s when young girls start to pull away.”
Leroux, a 2012 gold medalist and 2015 World Cup champion, said the No. 1 question she gets about her young son is whether he will play soccer. “I think the most important thing is to allow (kids) to be passionate about something,” said Leroux, who followed a different path than her mom, a player on the Canadian national softball team. “It doesn’t have to be soccer.”
Krieger, a key defender on many successful U.S. national teams, tried tumbling, basketball, volleyball and soccer as a child. “I feel like when kids stop wanting to play, that’s when you see it’s a result of parents maybe putting a lot of pressure and they’re forced to play only one sport,” she said.
Morgan grew up in a big baseball and softball family but didn’t want to play softball. “My dad was like, ‘I guess I have to learn the rules of soccer,’” she said. “With a little resistance, he did.”
Now Morgan, Harris, Krieger and Lerouox are all moms with young children. The players are supporting GoGo squeeZ’s Fun Comes First initiative, which aims to keep kids in sports by focusing on fun. GoGo squeeZ and Laureus USA recently created the Fun Comes First Playbook as a tool for parents, coaches and teachers to give their kids and athletes a voice.
“I think the prices of youth soccer are outrageous. … Some of the best players go unseen because of the amount of money that parents have to pay into these club teams. A lot of families can’t afford that. They can barely put food on their table, let alone play on a specific club team in the area.”
Ali Krieger, women's soccer star, on the need for a new U.S. youth soccer model
“I feel like representation is very, very important for our youth – for a child to say, ‘Sydney (Leroux) looks like me, I can do that.’ Or someone looks at Ali (Krieger) and I (as a married couple) and says, ‘Hey, my family looks just like them, I can do that.’ And Alex (Morgan), the same way. You can identify with so many different people (on the U.S. women’s soccer team) and I’m hopeful a young child sees that and says, ‘I want to be that when I grow up.’”
Ashlyn Harris, women's soccer star, on ways to grow sports participation
Project Play News
The Project Play Summit is returning in-person – and you don’t have to wait as long as usual. It’s less than five months away. Join us March 9, 2022, at the historic Andrew W. Mellon Auditorium in Washington D.C.
Early-bird registration is now open with reduced prices. Act now before the Summit sells out. Don’t miss the unparalleled networking opportunities with peers and inspiring leaders at our first in-person Summit in three years. Register at as.pn/ppsummit22.
Last year, Project Play announced a new initiative called Reimagining School Sports. The project aims to make quality sport and physical activities accessible to all high school students by identifying strategies that schools can adopt.
To date, six high schools have each been awarded $20,000 and recognized in Project Play reports with insights and ideas from different school types. Two more winners will still be announced. Watch the video to learn more about the winners.
How has the pandemic impacted the sports activity of children, adolescents and the programs that serve them? Read Project Play’s latest State of Play 2021 report with exclusive data and analysis from the past two years. In September, almost 3 in 10 youth sports parents said their child has lost interest in organized sports during COVID-19.
Jon Solomon is editorial director of the Aspen Institute’s Project Play initiative. He can be reached at jon.solomon@aspeninstitute.org.